Day 2 – Dinosaurs, Culture, and the universe in Los Angeles

Up early in the morning for our first full day of America! Our first stop was coffee, of course. We got Starbucks with our name on the cup so we’d fit in. I got one with olive oil(!!!) added and it didn’t taste quite as weird as you are probably thinking. I don’t know why it had olive oil – I presume there’s some sort of health benefit being touted? I mainly got it because we got to the register and I still hadn’t decided what I wanted so I panicked and asked for the first thing the lady understood when I talked Australian.

We then went for a walk to the La Brae Tar Pits and on the way saw some people nodding at like 8am in the middle of a main street, one with his glass pipe on a lanyard so he didn’t lose it bless him.

At the tar pits there were hairy elephants that got sticky taped in road base and now we can see their bones. There was quite a lot more information there, but that was the gist of it.

All that looking at dead animals made us hungry, so we stopped for another over priced feed before hitting up the art joint nearby. Because we’ve been here for 12 hours, I decided we’re locals now so I got the local special. I think that’s how it works? It was soup, and half a sammich. Was tempted to get two of them just to see if it was the same sandwich cut in half, or if they specially made 1/2 a sandwich. Honestly disappointed I never got to find that one out. Did someone else in Ray’s and Stark Bar get the other half of my sandwich? Did they get the bigger half? These are the things that keep me up at night.

Also got my first spam call on my new Google Fi number! Not bad… 12 hours from signup to spam.

Then we visited Los Angeles County Museum of Art (LACMA) to boost our culture points a little, and saw paintings I’ve previously only seen in Wikipedia articles. The famous “This is not a pipe” (because its a painting of a pipe!) just sounds like the sort of thing a smug insufferable idiot would say, which kinda sums up my opinion of artists in general for the most part. We offset our positive culture gains a little when some lady running a mini tour asked if we’d attended some famous gallery to see some other cultured bollocks and Erin is like “yeah nah, we’re from Austraya”.

They did have this rad Hotwheels track setup which is the sort of art I can get behind. I could have stayed and watched that all day. They only run it for short periods each hour because the little hot wheel cars over heat otherwise and I just think that is the cutest damn thing.

Getting to LACMA involved going up the tallest escalator I’ve ever seen. I think they call these “space elevators”, except those ones are slightly taller and go to space. And this was an escalator not an elevator. But in the most important aspects – the fact it went up, and it was long – they are practically identical.

From the top, we got a glimpse of the famous Hollywood sign! We’ll be seeing you later tonight, sign.

Went and had a look at space stuff at the Griffith Observatory, which turns out is quite big (space that is, although to a lesser extent so is the observatory).

Had a Snickerdoodle cookie for smoko which I pretty much just bought for the name, but it also tasted nice which was a plus. Also, Starbucks in a can!

Stayed around long enough to watch the sun set at which point people clapped(?!?), and then we all tried to go home in Ubers at the same time and triggered surge pricing so cost is twice as much to get home as to get there.

Everything was closed again for dinner (seriously what’s with that?) so opted for Bludso BBQ via Uber Eats as there was nothing within walking distance. Added some corn bread to the order which was really nice and I can totally see why it’s always getting stolen in prison movies.

That’s pretty much it for our first day. Feels like we’ve participated in more street racing in 24 hours then our entire hoon career around Brisbane in the 00s. It’s just how they drive here. Everyone is simultaneously the busiest and most important person on the road, who’s accelerator only exists in a binary state – on, or off. Someone wants to change lanes? Not on my watch! Jerk in the other lane thinks he’s faster than me?? I don’t think so buddy! Merge coming up? Me first me first me first! It’s like what Sydney would be, if everyone was in a dual cab Ranger.

Haven’t been shot as yet, although we’ve not been to any schools as yet.


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